Here's some of what went on during Max's 4th week.
On Friday my Aunt Sue and cousin Melissa come to town (with Melissa's cute kids)! They drove up from Houston. It was so fantastic to visit with them. I have appreciated being around people who knew and loved my mom. Even though it's hard because you naturally have conversations about the loss which bring up the pain, it's nice to be able to talk about her and how great she was(is). It is also a comfort to be able to mourn together and be reminded that I am not alone. I felt that I have stayed connected to family through my mom and now that she is gone, it seems that connection is severed and it's just me and my immediate family. I can tell myself that isn't true but her being gone does change things. She helped keep those relationships alive. Now I wonder if we'll be forgotten (my brain knows that won't happen but my heart still fears it). I appreciate the effort Sue and Melissa made to come up and visit Brittany and I because it helps me feel not so alone.
They were ready for dinner so the first thing we did is hit up in-n-out. Melissa was in heaven (she loves it as much as I do!) then went over to Britt's house to hang out. The kids immediately became fast friends which allowed the adults to get in some chatting. It was great to get some advice from Melissa and Sue on some of the techniques they've used to help gassy babies. Max was pretty fussy during their visit and having issues with being gassy. We have tried the gas drops and gripe water but I don't think they are helping very much.
My family at in-n-out
Saturday was Brittany's Birthday. Having family here just made the day more special for her. We all went over to her house in the morning and hung out some more. She made her own birthday cake and we sang to her. Her cake was amazing - I can't remember what it's called but I'll call it "Chocolate Toffee Pudding AMAZING Cake".
Family - I hope Max's eyes stay that blue
Happy on the floor
Another picture of our family
Max being loved on by the girls - Angelina, Vanessa, and Melissa
Enjoying the cake - Landen, Brittany, Hayden, David, and Vanessa
Mmmm - Angelina, Joe, Landen, Britt, Hayden
Max talking to Aunt Sue
We went out to lunch before Sue and co. headed back to Houston. We went to California Pizza Kitchen and Brittany got to blow out the candle on her birthday dessert.
Make a wish!
Max slept through most of the meal
Vanessa and her Grandma (Aunt Sue)
Later that night after we went home for a break, we took the Mejia's out to dinner to celebrate Brittany's birthday. (She shouldn't have to cook on her birthday and I didn't have my act together enough yet to cook her dinner.) She picked BJ's, which meant we got to enjoy their awesome Pizookie for dessert!
The Mejia family
Joe and his boys - so cute!
The celebration for Brittany wasn't over. I really wanted her to know how loved she is and bring her happiness since I know it would be hard for her since this is her first birthday without Mom. So on Sunday, we left the little boys (Hayden, Landen, and Max) with the big boys (Joe and Peter) and had some girl time. We went to go see the movie "The Help". It was awesome! Then we did some shoe shopping and Britt picked out some tennis shoes. This was the first time it was just the two of us without ANY kids since she moved here. I so love my sister and spending time with her. I am grateful they moved out here and that we have been able to grow our relationship and get to know each other better. She is a great mom and such a support to me as I am learning how to be a mom.
Here are some more pictures from the week.
Max holding onto my fingers
Sweet baby
Cute video of Max talking -
He's growing. I think it's cute how big his belly gets right after he eats.
This kid has had the "pouty" face down since he was born. He can WORK that bottom lip. It totally defeats his momma.
Max also got to meet one of his Grandmas this week! Peter's mom was going to have a layover in Dallas at DFW airport and it was long enough that we could pick her up and take her to lunch.
It ended up being a really full day. Since we only had one car, we had to do some adjusting to make it all work. I took Peter to work in the morning and then drove back and stopped in at CROSSMARK to show off Max. The timing ended up being bad and he started fussing nearly immediately. And of course, the sound of a baby is not something normal in the office so everyone starts peaking around their cubicles and coming out of their offices to see where the baby is. Max was screaming because he was hungry so I went into my office, shut my door, and worked on feeding him for the first time without the benefit of a couch/bed and a nursing pillow. It wasn't perfect but we made it work. (Thank goodness I have an office with a door that I could close and am no longer in a cubicle!) After he ate we continued walking around and showing my co-workers how cute he was. Again, he was fussy so I was holding him and bouncing him the whole time and no one got to hold him. That was good and bad. Good because then I didn't have to worry about all the germs but bad because I want people to be able to hold my sweet baby. I did not give myself enough time to visit with everyone I wanted to. I just didn't figure I would be there that long but there were so many people that stopped me and wanted to see the baby and chat. It made me feel special and I was missed at work. I still wasn't feeling healed enough yet to carry the heavy car seat so luckily I have some nice friends that helped us get in and out of the building. :) So it was nice to visit work and see everyone but I left feeling frantic and unsuccessful as a mom because he was so fussy and I felt like I still needed so much help from other people. I consoled myself with the thought, "at least he looked cute!" :)
So then I went back to Peter's work and we drove to the airport. We picked up Peter's mom, Donna, and her mother in law, Judy and took them to lunch at La Madeleine's (a YUMMY French Cafe). It was fun to see Donna's excitement over Max. It was special but was also hard because I was reminded that I'm not going to get to enjoy seeing my Mom and Max. (Moments like this happened nearly every day. It's really hard dealing with the loss of my mom at the same time I am trying to adjust to being a mom myself.) I am really glad though that Donna was able to see Max while he was still so little and that Max could meet his great grandma Judy.
After we dropped them back off at the airport we went to Peter's work and I hung out there while Peter had a meeting and then showed Max off around Peter's office too. Again, I was grateful that Peter had an office with a door that I could nurse in. I am learning that one of the con's to nursing is that when in public it's certainly not as convenient as having a bottle and it can be tough to find a place to nurse.
Here's some pictures from the day. (I really really really love the outfit Max is in)
Grandma Donna and Max
Great Grandma Judy and Max
Max sleeping in Dad's office
A couple other pics from this week:
So cute with no clothes on!
Sleeping on Aunt Brittany
Some of the things Max was up to this week...
He has started spitting up. Up to this point we never really needed any burp cloths.
He has finally started making those cute baby cooing noises
For the first time, I feel like there is some recognition in his eyes when he sees me
Max's third week was much more calm. It was mainly filled with days at home with mom.
Lookin' good in the onesie LeeAnn S. made
Here's Peter in action - being a good dad and trying to help his son with his hiccups.
This crazy kid loves to tilt his head to his right...he does it in the bouncy seat and his car seat.
On Saturday the rest of Max's umbilical cord fell off, so 2 weeks after he was born. I was glad to finally see a "normal" bellybutton and know that he wasn't damaged by his intense crying from last week.
Umbilical cord is gone!
Sweetly Sleeping
Now that his umbilical cord had come off, I wanted to give Max a bath but wanted approval from the urologist first. I checked with his urologist when the office called to remind us of Max's follow up visit. I wanted to know if we could give him a "real" bath now. The Dr. said yes, so we were excited to move past the hassle of sponge baths.
Getting ready for the bath
Sweet face
You are going to put me in there?!
This is awesome!
He loved the bath and calmly enjoyed the warm water. (I know his belly looks really big in the above picture, he had just eaten and his full belly tends to spread out to the sides instead of out to the front.)
I love this outfit
On Tuesday we had Max's follow up with his urologist. At this point Peter and I still only had one car and it was at work with him. Thank goodness for Brittany! She came to my rescue. And luckily we were able to fit 3 car seat in her back seat. Today was the first day that I carried Max's car seat by myself. Up to now, either Brittany or Peter had carried it. It is totally awkward for me! If I try and carry it by holding the handle with my arm at my side, the car seat basically drags on the ground. And then if I wrap my arm around the handle (like at my elbow), then it puts too much pressure on my midsection and causes me pain. There was really no easy way to do it. I wish I was taller!
3 sleepin' boys - Hayden (can't see him), Max, and Landen
After the Dr's (which went fine - he said Max was healing well), I took Brittany out for some lunch - Mexican food! It was fun to eat with just us and the kids. At one point, I checked my phone to see what time it was. Knowing what time it is had always been important when I was out to lunch during the week because there was always some conference call or meeting that I needed to get back for. When I looked at my phone this time, it hit me that I had NOTHING that I had to get home for. I could stay out and enjoy lunch or whatever else I wanted to do for as long as I wanted. That was a really weird realization for me. I felt like a real stay at home mom. Since I had such a free afternoon, Britt and I also ran errands, unplanned. How awesome to be able to just add outings into your day that weren't scheduled there! Even though I'm now tied to a person (Max), I am also experiencing a new type of freedom.
Mom, stop it with the paparazzi pics!
Going from calm to upset...
I love it when he sleeps on me, it is such a tender time.
Loving the bouncy seat.
Later in the week, I was feeling pretty adventurous. So Brittany came over and we took all the boys for a walk at the park next to our apartment. I walked further than I'd walked since Max was born and only stopped a couple times to sit down and rest. It was good improvement and felt good to be able to get moving. (Although I was in pain later in the evening for it.)
Sleeping on his first walk at the park
That night, we went with Brittany to try Smash Burger for the first time. I thought it was pretty good but still not as good as my favorite In-n-Out!
Hayden, Brittany, and Landen
Peter, Max, Kallie - Peter struggles to not pull a face in pictures
Max's second week of life had it's share of trauma for both me and Max.
After Peter got back from taking the Amos's to the airport, we had a calm, quiet Sunday filled with just hanging out.
I love cute baby pajamas
He fell asleep this way. This boy really doesn't care about a pacifier.
Look at that chunky face!
Video of Max falling asleep with a cute cameo by a sneeze - I love his sneezes!
On every Monday Peter works from home, which is wonderful! This Monday, it was greatly appreciated so I wasn't completely alone yet. We had an appointment with a pediatric urologist to get Max circumcised am I was glad Peter was there with me. It's not fun to hear your baby in pain.
Tummy time - bum in the air
At the Urologist office
At the Dr's office - notice his middle finger. Think he knew what was coming and had a message for us?
You can see how worn out he is from screaming :(
Max didn't cry too much during the procedure, it was after and especially on the ride home that he really screamed. It was so bad when we were driving that I had Peter pull off the freeway so I could hop in back with Max and try and comfort him. Max has some serious lungs and his poor face goes red. It makes me so sad for him. :( Later that day when I was changing his diaper I noticed that his umbilical cord that hadn't been coming off at all that morning was now just hanging by a thread and was bloody. That completely freaked me out. I figured that all his screaming had somehow contributed to this and was worried that the cord was coming off before it was ready. I was so stressed about it, I was ready to take Max to his doctor but Peter reassured me that it wouldn't have started to come off if it wasn't ready. Every diaper change though, I was examining his belly. I have pictures of this but won't subject you to them.
On Tuesday Peter went to work and I was home alone, for the first time with Max. Overall we did pretty well. As you can see below, there were some calm moments. I did have a friend, Lori, from work stop by on her lunch break. It was nice to have her there especially since she has two kids of her own and has been a source of knowledge for me. And then Brittany came over for a little bit too. It's AWESOME to have her living so close. I am going to enjoy that a lot in the months to come while I am home on maternity leave.
Happy and hanging out with Mom
However, by the time Peter got home, I was ready for some Daddy reinforcements and Max was too. Peter was great and took over baby duty as soon as he walked in. (It wasn't that much of a sacrifice, I could tell he had missed Max during the day.) Most of Max's umbelical cord fell off during the day however his belly button didn't look normal and there was still some dark stuff on it so I was glad we'd be seeing his doctor at the end of the week and she could check it out. Thank goodness for Google though, it is a fantastic resource to me as a new parent to check things out and see if they are "normal".
It was a rough day being alone with Mom all day!
On Wednesday, Peter again went to work all day. I was a little more adventurous than the previous day and loaded Max up in his stroller and we went downstairs to pick up the mail. It was amazing to me how little I got done during the day when it was just me and Max. I was so busy taking care of him that it was a struggle to find anytime to do anything but take care of him. If I got something to eat before noon, that was a win. And where was I supposed to find time to shower?
I know it's not very nice to video my poor son screaming rather than picking him up and comforting him, but I had to document his cry.
Don't worry - I only put socks on his hands a couple times. I just can't do that to him.
Going for a (short) walk to get the mail.
That night we gave Max another sponge bath. Since he was still healing from the circumcision, it was a partial sponge bath. He loved being in the water and stayed nice and calm.
He loved his bath!
The shirt says it all
I feel bad that his head is nearly always crooked in the car seat but he prefers it that way.
Close up! (Despite his beautiful skin when he was born, he did end up having some baby acne.)
Sweet little sleeper. I LOVE it when he snuggles in like this.
Kisses!
On Friday we had Max's Two Week Old visit with his pediatrician. He did a great job (he didn't have to do much but lay there and be examined and then bleed quickly when they pricked his foot to pull blood for a test). Dr. Gondol, his pediatrician, looked at his belly button and confirmed that part of the cord had fallen off but that there was still some there so no regular baths yet.
Dad and Max at the Dr's
Mom and Max at the Dr's
Here are Max's stats from the visit...
Weight - 7 lbs 10.5 oz (20th Percentile)
Height - 19.5 inches (12th Percentile - yikes, I hope he doesn't have my height genes!)
Head - 35.75 (24th Percentile)
Other points from Max's second week of life
Max is getting hard to put to sleep at night. When Max wakes up, Peter gets up and changes him and burps him while I get ready to nurse. For the first couple weeks Peter was also helping me during those feedings because my mobility was still limited. He was also helpful when it came to nursing. Max's hands were always in the way so I needed a third hand to hold his hand out of the way so that he could eat. Once Max starts eating, Peter goes back to bed and then I put Max to bed when he's done. I struggled so much this week to get him to go back down after eating. I was so tired from lack of sleep anyway that it was hard to have the energy to keep trying after trying for up to an hour sometimes. I sure hope I get the hang of this because I end up only getting short naps inbetween finally getting him down and the next time he wakes up hungry.
I am moving around much better and having less pain when I move. By the end of the week I walked at a nearly normal pace and mainly only felt pain when I was doing something that involved my abs like squatting down or moving in bed. Hopefully by next week I will be back to basically "normal".
I can tell that Max is already growing and getting bigger - amazing! However he is still really little in the newborn clothes and his carseat.
We love this baby. Peter is head over heels in love with him. He coos to him and kisses him. He danced with him to Mozart one day while I was taking a shower so Max could get the benefit of the steam. At work, Peter checks in on Max while he is sleeping via the baby monitor/webcam.
Max has been congested and there's not much you can do for a newborn so we have given him saline drops and keep a humidifier running 24-7.
I don't think it's hit me yet that I am a mom. It feels like I might just be watching someone elses baby for them. He certainly is an absolutely cute and sweet baby but I don't feel like I have that amazing connection everyone talks about yet. I think part of it is because I am so tired and worn down. And in that state, I seem to gravitate quicker to sadness than happiness. I have been mourning my mom a lot. Every day is rough. She would have been here this week.
Wife, Mom, and Career Woman. Trying to succeed at all three. Enjoy cruising, time with friends and family, and sleeping. Busy life doesn't leave time for as much fun as in the past but that's okay, it's still a good life.
