Goodbye 2011 - Highest Highs and Lowest Lows

Goodbye 2011.  You were a roller coaster ride.

Down - You started out rough with lots of "morning" sickness.

Up - In March, Peter and I went on one of my dream vacations.  We went on a Mediterranean cruise to Italy, Greece, and Turkey with a couple extra days in Rome.  It was amazing.  It was a nice reward for making it through my first trimester.  I got to see places I had only dreamed of ever seeing in person.  I had many "pinch me" moments because I couldn't believe that I wasn't dreaming.  And, the best part, Peter loved it too.  :)  It was my most memorable vacation ever!

Down - In July, my mom left us.  It came as a huge shock but was not unexpected (that may be a confusing description to you but it's the truth).  Losing her was extremely painful as was the ensuing work that had to be done in Salt Lake with her funeral and cleaning out her house.  I lost it once in the days after her death to the point of doing that cry where you can't catch your breath and Max kicked me - HARD.  It was a reminder that I didn't get to lose myself in mourning because there was a little baby inside me that was affected too.  I mourned her death deeply but not really until after Max was born.  And then it was awful.  Daily crying, everything reminded me of her and how she was no longer there.  You can image what a mess I was with that going on and my hormones being all over the place anyway after having a baby.  I know my mom was in pain and had a hard life.  I still just can't wrap my brain/heart around how she could leave just 3 weeks before Max was born.

Up - Maxwell Charles Millar arrived on August 19th!  Our lives have changed, our hearts have grown.  I adore him.  I miss him while he's sleeping.  I stress over being the best possible mom I can.  I still am amazed that we have a baby!  It's unbelievable to me that after so long of nothing happening, that we finally were blessed with a son.  It's been 1 year and 10 days since I learned I was pregnant.  That time has flown by.  We have been showered with love and support.  We have had more visits from friends and family in the 4 months since Max was born than we got in the last 4 years. 

Down - On Dec 16 I broke my foot.  How? Walking.  Yeah.  That exciting.  Other than my c-section, my medical history was blank.  I had never had stitches, never broken anything, never had surgery - not even to get my wisdom teeth removed.  So, this broken foot rocked my world.  Not only did I have a broken foot that I couldn't put any weight on, but it happened during the holiday season when there are parties, shopping, baking, etc.  All activities that were now much more complicated if cancelled for this year.  AND I had a 4 month old who I couldn't walk around with, couldn't move from room to room, couldn't carry to the car, couldn't push in a stroller... you get the idea.  The timing was AWFUL.  I have struggled to remain positive and cheerful.

So, 2011...you gave me some amazing gifts and pushed me down at the same time.  I can't think of any other year in my life that has had such extremes.  I imagine down the road I will look back and see how much I grew because of what I went through this year.  However, at this point, I really hope 2012 is more of a pleasant, calm train ride rather than another roller coaster ride.